A Pig’s Life

“I don’t know what I’m going to do with my life. It seems like everything I do has no meaning.”

I told my brother about my quarter life crisis. At this stage of my life, I almost tried everything and made a point to check everything in my bucket list but still, I feel something is missing and I can’t pinpoint what it is.

My brother replied: “When I was your age, I never thought of that. But you’re lucky that you are thinking your purpose in life. Some people will never think about that. Why don’t you take a break, travel, contemplate, find yourself?”

This advice sounded useful but my brother was laughing all the time as if I was a big joke. I find this conversation predestined because after a few weeks I-need-to-find-myself theme became a trending topic. ( Thanks to Billy Crawford and Nikki Gil’s breakup)

I thought of my obsession in travelling alone in India where I can be a vegetarian for a month, learn yoga, and have a journal with me. Perhaps, there I can find myself. But India is beyond my reach. So i tried to find inspiration within my environment. Then, I thought of the pig my aunt was taking care of. This leads me to a conversation I had with a friend…

Me: Do you eat the fish you have taken care of?
Friend:  that’s the plan
Me:  You killed the fish you once cared for
Friend:  It’s the circle of life
Me:  Food chain haha
Friend: One day I’ll die and help grass grow.. that grass will feed a cricket and a fish will eat the cricket it all works out haha
Me:  But the lives of the fish and the pigs will be meaningful only when they die
Friend:  That’s a good point! hopefully my life is a little more meaningful
Me:  Yah, it has more meaning than feeding the crickets and feeding the fish
Friend:  thank goodness! what are you doing this afternoon?
Me:   Waiting for the rain to stop, then jog and maybe read … and find meaning in my life lol
Friend:  Find meaning in your life? what do you mean by that? Lol
Me:  How do i find meaning in my life? i just look at the grass and wait for the crickets to feast on them

When I thought about my aunt’s pig, I realize how awful a pig’s life is. He is a lifetime prisoner and is sentenced to death. He moves in a small corner of his pig pen and then he sleeps again. The life of the pig is sacrificial. He is a hero to a family who’s waiting for a large feast. He is born to die. You can only measure his worth when he dies.

This is the pig I'm talking about

This is the pig I’m talking about

Well, what am I talking about? I hope my life is more than a pig’s life.

These are my silly random thoughts…

How about you?How do you find your purpose in life? 🙂

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. ThroughTheLookingGlassAndDownTheRabbitHole
    Sep 08, 2013 @ 10:00:18

    I think I’m in the middle of a quarter life crisis too 😦 But I’m trying to do what makes me happy until it’s over :p

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  2. ResidentPatriot
    Aug 01, 2013 @ 13:22:06

    travelling alone in india is not advisable especially for women or young ladies…

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  3. zezil
    Aug 01, 2013 @ 02:42:47

    Hi there Jackie! Thank you for your question! 🙂

    I think for us 20 something people, this question always prod in mind. I’d have to agree with your brother, “finding self” is an effective way to mull on our goals and purpose. What I usually do is jog in the park whenever I try to collect thoughts and ponder on my existence. There weren’t Eureka moments but it eases my anxiety. 🙂

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    • jackieB
      Aug 01, 2013 @ 07:30:11

      thanks zez! you make me feel normal hehe…yah, jogging helps….ang hirap hanapin ang sarili! im still hoping for a eureka moment to come… this is just probably a phase in our lives where we want to find deeper meaning..ganito lang yung crisis ng mga 20s 🙂

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