Men in Pain

“When I see you cry, it makes me smile” – Lily Allen

I am not a man-hater but am I a sadist if I like to see men in pain? I’m not talking about relationships. I am referring to males in general including baby boys, grandpas and macho guys. I have a soft spot for men who show some vulnerability. I like to see men begging, bleeding, pleading, weeping. I like to hear wailing and sobbing sounds from men. I sometimes find gratification in repetitively listening to music of a man truthfully singing a sad love song. And when I see a man who is on the verge of crying, I sigh and say ‘ahhhh…. (I’m touched.)’  I like to read letters written with so much pain by men. I also like stories whose male leads fall in desperation.

They say men like women who are weak and vulnerable because they want to take the role of knight in shining armor.  By instinct man will want to have a girl he can defend. It is one way of displaying his masculinity. But on my part, it’s the other way around. Though I don’t want a man who is weak and insecure, I like to see men in their most delicate moments. It feels like I want to tap their shoulders, comfort them, cry with them, give them a big warm hug.

Precious Moments

Am I cruel to say these things? I will never want to inflict pain to anybody. Never! Men in pain are just rare to find. Some will choose to hide tears and some are naturally expressionless. Between an action star who will promise me he can kill monsters and bring me to the moon and a simple guy on bended knees with Precious Moments eyes,   I choose the latter. It’s not the sorrow that counts. It’s the intensity of emotions. I believe men with intense emotions have so much depth and has much passion to fuel life.

I remember my dad was talking about my cousin’s wedding. And all of a sudden, he was on tears as he described how the groom cried when the bride was marching. Honestly, that made me laugh. It shows how sentimental he is and that for me is a lovable trait.

Odyssey, one of the classics of world literature, centers on a Greek hero Odysseus.  Interesting to note, the protagonist Odysseus and other men in the epic had a lot of crying scenes. Perhaps, I am no sadist at all.  I am just from 8th century BC. I like to see strong mighty men at their weakest.

Nah, I just like men to know  how it feels to have dysmenorrhea.

P.S. I can’t hurt a male specimen

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11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. June
    Dec 18, 2012 @ 12:28:46

    Alright! What you have is a legitimate feeling I think. Men who are at peace with expressing their emotions are people who gained self-mastery.
    Ah, dysmenorrhea! That should be enough reason for some males to stop wishing they were females. 😀

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    • jackieB
      Dec 19, 2012 @ 02:33:07

      thanks for acknowledging that it’s a legitimate feeling hehe .. hmm.. why does it take self-mastery for men to be more expressive? when you feel like crying, you just do it without thinking.. i bet kulang lang talaga sa feelings ang mga lalake

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      • June
        Dec 19, 2012 @ 14:36:07

        Hmmm. Personally, I don’t believe that being emotional or expressive or something have something to do inherently with gender. It’s the brain components, fundamental traits and environmentally acquired personality of the person that would determine one’s attitude. Regardless of sexuality an individual can be emotional or apathetic. I’ve met a lot of women who are tougher than men and men more vulnerable than women.
        It’s the culture of chivalry and the tradition of machismo that somehow made the generalization that men should be tougher thus, should be not so open with exposing vulnerabilities. However, I can see that that fact is slowly changing now. Equality is fast emerging than we thought. We can see that in the changing trends in how men are being described in contemporary literature, movies and the likes. 😉
        Nevertheless. I also like the sight of men crying but the ones who tried so hard to suppress them and later give in than those who cry like like it’s already the so-called 21st of December 2012. 😀

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    • jackieB
      Dec 20, 2012 @ 07:36:37

      i strongly agree it has nothing to do with gender. it’s about culture and expectations of other people. in a place, where we are used to seeing ladies cry more than men, it’s pogi points for me if i see men cry .. it just shows that they are brave to be vulnerable (sounds ironic? hehe) 🙂

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  2. dba12
    Dec 17, 2012 @ 10:39:52

    The rock star sing a song always with pain… Without pain they can’t song…..Pain is important for to be successful …..

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  3. jackieB
    Dec 17, 2012 @ 04:15:03

    hmm… those with black-eyeliner? I don’t really mind how they look haha but yah, i like those emo in heart pero hindi emo-emo lang.. emo and sensible! hehe

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  4. zezil
    Dec 17, 2012 @ 03:21:06

    Dysmenorrhea! Argh! The horror!

    Interestingly, the song by paramore came to my mind while reading this: When I was young–ger I saw, my daddy cry, and curse at the wind….

    Also reminded me of the guy in 500 days with Summer!

    Are you, uhm, do the emo people (like those with black-eyeliner, sorry, stereotyping here) belong to this category of guys you are referring to?

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